Insights into how to successfully navigate the unique situations and challenges that arise for people with the trait of high sensitivity and the people in their lives.
Welcome! First off, I want to give credit and thanks to
the wonderful Dr. Elaine Aron who first introduced all of us to this
important inherited trait of high sensitivity and who wrote the landmark
The Highly Sensitive Person:
How to Thrive When the World Overwhelms You. And, make sure you
visit her website www.hsperson.com.
Now, as an introduction to the trait of high sensitivity, see if some of these statements resonate with you, or relate to someone important in your life...
You, your partner, or someone important to you have a heightened awareness of subtleties in your environment, whether it's sight, sound, touch, taste, or smell.
You can become stressed out and upset when overwhelmed and may find it necessary to get away, maybe into a darkened room, to seek solitude, relief and comfort.
You are very creative.
You are very conscientious, hard working, and meticulous, but may become uncomfortable and less efficient or productive when being watched or scrutinized.
You feel compelled to file and organize things and thoughts, also enjoy simplicity and may become overwhelmed or even immobilized by chaos, clutter, or stress.
You are very uncomfortable when feeling things are getting out of your control.
You get a sense of comfort and well being when around a lake, river, stream, the ocean, or even a fountain.
You may experience mood swings, sometimes occurring almost instantly and can also be affected by other people's moods, emotions and problems.
You have a deep, rich, inner life, are very spiritual, and may also have vivid \s.
You are very intuitive and you feel that you can usually sense if someone isn't telling the truth or if something else is wrong.
You get concerned and think or worry about many things, and have also been told "you take things too personally."
You have had the experience of "cutting people out" of your life.
You were considered quiet, introverted, timid, or shy as a child.
Here are a few more to consider... Can be startled easily. Cautious in new situations. May have trouble sleeping. Extra sensitive to pain. Don't like crowds (unless they are kindred spirits). Avoids violent movies and TV shows. Has a deep respect and appreciation of nature, music and art.
Do some, or many, of these statements ring true for you, your partner, or someone important in your life? If so, you or they may be a highly sensitive person or "HSP." Whether you already know something about the trait and temperament of highly sensitive people, or if this is your first introduction to the subject, welcome! The goal and intent of this website is to impart information, provide support and be a resource to individuals with the trait of high sensitivity and for the people in their lives.
A lot has been discovered about the psychology and neuroscience of being a Highly Sensitive Person in the past few years and why you respond to events in your life in a way that sometimes seems so puzzling, far more than I can review in this website. But hopefully by highlighting some of the aspects of this trait for you, these few pages will give you some insight into why you often feel out of sync with the people around you.
I encourage you to check out the other pages here on the Highly Sensitive Person website for more information on the nature of what it means to be a Highly Sensitive Person, and how the Trait of High Sensitivity can impact you in the areas of your Personal Relationships and communication skills, your Career, your Health and Well-being, and even your Spirituality, and how by learning more about this trait you can use these insights and tips to begin to make adjustments in your life, your thoughts and your attitude to take the fullest of advantages of being a person who experiences life on a level much more intensely than the average person. And I've also added a new page describing my personal Life Coaching for HSPs service, if you'd like to be personally guided by me into exploring your amazing trait on a one-on-one basis.
I've put together this site as a brief overview of some of the aspects of being a highly sensitive person because from my years of counseling and coaching HSPs, it has become clear that most people with the trait of high sensitivity often think that there's something wrong with them because they feel and respond so differently from most of the "normal" people they interact with every day. And even when they learn about how their brains and bodies work, and understand the science that explains these differences, they often still regard it as something of a disability.
It is my belief that this trait is not a burden, but rather a special gift because it opens you up to a wide world of amazing possibilities and potentials.
You have a great inheritance and you are in a class with a great many very successful, accomplished persons. But as it has been said, with great power comes great responsibility, and you have a responsibility to take care of yourself, to protect your gifts, and to understand that you have a special relationship with the people around you who are not so blessed.
What Do These Famous People Have in Common?
Abraham Lincoln....Carl Jung....Apple's Steve Jobs....Princess Diana. They are all HSP! (Highly Sensitive Persons) or what I also refer to as "Alphas" — those people who have an on going tug-of-war between their head and their heart, individuals who are in touch with both their Masculine and Feminine Energies.
HSP "Meetup" in West L.A. on Apr. 15, 8-9:30 p.m.
If you live in Southern California you are invited to our HSP "Meetups" in Los Angeles are held on the 3rd Wednesday of every month. To find out more about
the L.A. Meetups visit the Highly
Sensitive People Meetup site to learn more, sign up and join our HSP
Meetup group, and to RSVP for our next "Meetup." And because I'm also a Certified WANT® Institute Educator in Androgynous
Semantic Realignment (ASR),™ her trademarked system of language and
communication, I'm able to discuss Dr. Pat Allen's work, too. (See note on Coaching, below.)
We meet at the new SHARE Center, 6666 Green Valley Circle, Culver City, across the 405 Freeway from the Hughes Center, from 8 p.m. until 9:30 p.m. Suggested $10 donation is appreciated to help pay for the room. By the way, for those of you not able to attend our monthly meetings, we've tried an experiment and videotaped the most recent session. A DVD (and maybe even a downloadable video) will soon be available to show what happens at a typical HSP Meetup. If you're interested in viewing this, please sign into the Meetup page and let me know!
These are sure to be interesting evenings learning about and discussing the trait of high sensitivity. If you're an HSP, they'll be evenings of learning to understand yourself better, and if you're a Non-HSP you'll learn how to better understand those Highly Sensitive People in your life. Because HSPs make up about 20% of the population, you are sure to come into contact with many of them, so why not make the most of those relationships; social, business and romantic?
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What Some Of My Clients Have Told Me....
- "Jim, your sessions have been a huge part of me getting myself back! Your warmth and charm is a place I can go when I just can't take the world, as it is a place for skills to learn how to manage as an HSP in this world." — Theresa
- "Thank you! Thank you! You are responsible for changing my life for the better! Much Better!" — Darron S.
- "Jim Hallowes' coaching and his work with Highly Sensitive People opened up a whole new awareness about my son and myself that gave me more relief and answers than anything else. He gave me more understanding of HSP and how we don't need to be fixed. I want to thank you for this gift of knowledge you are giving people. It has been truly helpful." — Tammy Hiatt Monaco, Life and Wellness Coach
Watch This Video To Learn
Disclaimer: Jim Hallowes is not a medical doctor or a clinical psychologist. As a Certified WANT® Institute ASR Cognitive Behavioral Coach, he works with people who are coping with life but who want to thrive and succeed even more. Any forms of assistance offered by Jim are self-developmental in nature, and do not replace medical or clinical psychological treatment. People who have a medical problem should contact their licensed medical doctor or other suitable qualified professional. Highly Sensitive People is the registered trademark of James M. Hallowes. Please note that Dr. Pat Allen's legal counsel has sent me a letter which directs me to state here that: "The WANT® Institute is not affiliated with this website/newsletter and does not sponsor or endorse the content of this website/newsletter or the services of Jim Hallowes." and "ASR (Androgenous Semantic Realignment) is a trademark of the WANT® Institute."
Honored to be named a Twoology® Relationship Expert.
Jim Hallowes, Relationship Coach, has been selected as "One of America's 100 Most Distinguished Relationship Experts" on Twoology.com — where you will find powerful relationship tools, their unique Romantipedia, expert videos by relationship experts and lots of other helpful information.
As they proclaim on their website: "Great Relationships are complicated. Twoology's A-B-C Relationship System Makes It Easy For Yours To Be Great." Twoology is the One Place for the Two of You and they offer you the tools to "Do It for Yourself. Do It For Your Relationship. Do It Now and Forever."
Click here to visit Twoology.com and watch the Introductory video and my own "How to cope with different emotional styles." Also in the series is "How to deal with different temperament styles" and "How to I deal with the HSPs in your life." Other videos on the site include how to keep yourself from becoming angry and much more.
I have also been invited by the people at GenConnect to join their Panel of Experts as the resident authority on HSP, along with Dr. Pat Allen as their expert on Relationship and Communication Issues. If you're not familiar with GenConnect, it's an on-line "Facebook"-type forum where you can interact with a wide variety of knowledgeable coaches, lecturers and authors on topics of self-development, and mingle with a community of like-minded individuals. They were also the co-sponsors (along with MORE Magazine) of the recent "Reinvention-Convention" in New York City which we both attended. Their website is really a great place to get a lot of up-to-the-minute information on a variety of topics, and of course you can view our Jim Hallowes and Dr. Pat Allen video segments there as well, at GenConnect.com/Experts.
Listen to Jim Hallowes' Interviews
I was the in-studio guest on Los Angeles' radio popular long-running The Aware Show with Lisa Garr, on KPFK 90.7 FM, talking about the trait of high sensitivity and Highly Sensitive People. According to Lisa, The Aware Show is "dedicated to communicating information to inspire positive growth and change. Our goal is an increased awareness and healing on an individual and planetary level." Listen to the complete show or you can order an audio CD-ROM from the Highly Sensitive People Gift Store.
This Could Be Keeping You From Your Ideal Life
Most Highly Sensitive People think very deeply about their
lives, especially focusing on the obstacles and problems they seem to
continually encounter. So don't think that you're alone in constantly
wondering what's wrong and what is keeping you from achieving your
goals and aspirations.
It may even keep you up at night, because you have a mental picture of what your Ideal Life should be, yet somehow things keep falling short. Maybe you don't know what to do, or maybe you're trying your best but every time you feel close to realizing your ambitions, does some false fear or uncertainty seem to pop up and once again get in your way?
There's a very well-documented reason this happens.
You may be familiar with the concept of Negative or Limiting Beliefs, these subconscious emotional reactions that actually hold you back from feeling fulfilled in your relationships, making enough money, losing weight or just feeling confident and self-assured enough to go out the door in the morning with a smile on your face and bounce in your step.
I've got a great tip for you, and that's to discover what might be going on deep down in your subconscious by taking a free 60-second self-evalulation quiz, now being offered by my friend Paul Hoffman.
I think you'll be surprised by what it can reveal about how your highly sensitive nature is actually working against your goals and desires... but only if you let it.
Click here to take a free 60-second quiz that can reveal some of these hidden blockages.
You see, in order to have that ideal life you so desperately want to live, you really need to know how to get out of your own way…and focus your mind on what you truly want in life.
This simple quiz gives you the opportunity to identify and make immediate improvements in the four most important areas that profoundly impact everyone's life: Feeling more love and intimacy, Earning more money, Zeroing in an an ideal weight, and Becoming more confident and comfortable in every situation in life.
I recommend you decide which of these areas is giving you the most trouble, and then take the quiz in that area of life you most want to improve on… and I recomment you do it now. Because one of the most positive things you can do to move ahead in any activity is to avoid procrastination and take immediate, positive action.
And once you are finished answering a few thought provoking (but mind-opening) questions, Paul's automated website will immediately send you a complimentary customized video report that nails precisely what’s really blocking you from getting ahead financially, losing weight, feeling more confident or finding the love and intimacy you deserve.
Yeah, I've seen a few of these "self-improvement quizzes" floating around the internet lately, even taken a couple just for laughs. But believe me, Paul is serious here, and he has the training and the clinical background to really give you insight into the specific steps you can take to reprogram your life for the success and achievement you've been striving after for years now.
Take this short quiz and you'll now know exactly what to do to stop sabotaging your success. You'll marvel at how accurate the results can be in pinpointing subconscious blocks and neutralizing once and for all those limiting beliefs that have been holding you back for years.
The HSP Movie Has Become a Reality... Thanks for Your Help!
New discoveries often take a long time to filter down into the public
consciousness and for professional educators to acknowledge new
viewpoints. Dr. Elaine Aron wrote a landmark book on the subject of
HSPs and has been researching the subject since 1996. That's why she
was thrilled to be contacted by a high-profile film producer who wants
to work with her to make a full-length PBS-quality documentry about the
trait of high sensitivity.
She enthusiastically enlisted her fans in raising money to produce a "sizzle reel" (a kind of movie trailer for investment backers) and they responded with equal zeal. Now the project has moved a quantum leap forward by successfully completing a crowdfunding project on the Kickstarter.com website for Sensitive: The HSP Movie. They have succeeded in reaching their goal with over $50,000 pledged by HSPs throughout the world.
Although Elaine is embarassed that the movie will focus so much on herself, the producers have reassured her (and us) that their film will thoughtfully explain what high sensitivity is, the huge advantages that come with the trait, and how to deal with problems that can occur when it is not fully understood. They will include interviews with many other researchers of the trait, as well as a diverse sample of highly sensitive individuals who will discuss how the trait has affected them and their closest relationships.
If you'd like to get an advance look at this exciting project, please visit the fundraising website to view the sizzle reel. If you're an HSP it may be a bit overstimulating, with the quick cuts and strong images typical of a Hollywood movie trailer and meant to reach you emotionally. But the film itself will be a quality documentary aiming to raise awareness of this trait among both the general public and professionals and other researchers.
Indeed, the time has come for this information to receive a wider exposure, and what better way than to take advantage of the blessing of crowdfunding which is basically a way to let the people themselves decide what is to be produced. (It sure worked for Veronica Mars!) In this case, highly sensitive people will at last have a professional film that explains to other HSPs, and the people who they have to deal with, what this trait is all about. So many say understanding that this trait is completely normal has changed their lives by explaining why they have always felt different, and it has helped parents to appreciate how their children are special.
This film is fully endorsed by Dr. Elaine Aron and will help Highly Sensitive Persons throughout the world discover and learn about their inherited trait and offer an excellent way to inform the 80% non-HSPs about the trait of high sensitivity.
The film will be helmed by Emmy award-winning director (and HSP himself) Will Harper, and I'm excited to say that my friend Shari Dyer, who if you were on our Cruise to Alaska a few years back you may remember, is an Associate Producer on Sensitive!
It looks like the HSP's time has come!
Highly Sensitive People Need a Higher Vibration
I was amazed to learn that Albert Einstein (who was a highly sensitive person himself) was the first scientist who began to explore the quality of "vibration" in the universe. He determined that all matter is just another expression of fundamental energy, and everything in the universe — the sun, the earth, our bodies, our lives, the words we speak and the thoughts we have — is nothing more than a vibration of energy.
The rate each of these energies vibrates is called its frequency, and scientists are discovering that it's possible to experience entirely different states of consciousness, as well as stimulating powerful energy centers in the brain and functions such as creativity and mood enhancement, just by subtly "tuning" their frequencies. And the more highly tuned nervous system of an HSP benefits the most utilizing them.View more...
How Your Mind Shapes Your Personal Reality
It may sound like a cliché, but that doesn't make it any less true when I remind you that you are a unique individual.
There will never be another person in this world who has your
personality, your unique mixture of strengths and weaknesses, and your
breadth of emotional experiences. And it follows then that you are here
to live your unique life, your way and on terms that are uniquely
determined by your own set of personal wants, not-wants and life goals.
You are not here to serve the wants and agendas of the people you work for, the people you live with, the government or the media. Your only responsibility toward them is to love them and wish only the best for them, and to share with them your own individual set of talents, skills and creativity to foster a happier and more productive world for all of us.
To this end, your main responsibility, however, is to be yourself. To create what you want in your own life, and have the things you desire in life without any sense of guilt or selfishness, knowing that you are a worthy person and deserve only the best richness of experience that life has to offer.
Unfortunately though, many people find themselves trapped in a box that they mistakenly
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~ With Jim Hallowes, the Founder of Highly Sensitive People ~
My Next HSP Talk in Escondido
Once again, it will be my priviledge to speak in May at the
here in Escondido, Calif. Join me for an evening of interactive
discussion on the Trait of High Sensitivity based on my experience and
the work of
Dr. Elaine Aron (who now refers to her discovery as Sensory Processing Sensitivity). I hope to give you some very useful tips, and if you're an HSP yourself it will be an
evening of discovering how to understand yourself (and your rare trait) better.
HSPs make up about 15-20% of the population, including many high-profile and creative personalities from past and present such as Abraham Lincoln, Emily Dickinson, Edgar Allen Poe, Leonardo Da Vinci, Vincent Van Gogh, Georgia O'Keefe, and contemporaries such as the late founder of Apple Computers Steve Job, John Lennon, Alfred Hitchcock, Walt Disney, Alanis Morisette, Barbara Streisand, Steven Spielberg, George Lucas, and the notable cinema "wunderkind" genius and star of Paul Masson's "We Will Sell No Wine Before Its Time" TV commercials, Orson Welles -- with whom I was priviledged to work many years ago.
And let's not leave out a whole lot of very funny and very talented HSP women: Judy Garland, Katherine Hepburn, Nicole Kidman, Glenn Close, and my friend Dolly Parton, to name but a few. I've found that many actors and especially comedians are HSP, including funnymen Jeff Ross, Steve Martin, Eddie Murphy, Woody Allen, Johnny Carson, Mel Brooks, Jim Carrey... the list goes on and on.
So, even if you're not Highly Sensitive yourself, you are sure to come into contact with many, so why not discover how to make the most of those relationships -- social, business and romantic? As a Certified Dr. Pat Allen WANT® Institute Androgynous Semantic Realignment™ (A.S.R.) Coach and Trainer, I'll also be discussing how masculine and feminine energies interact in relationships, and explaining how to communicate your wants and needs with integrity.
As that quizmaster used to bark on tv years ago: "Come on down!"
May 25, 7-9 p.m. $10. The Philosophical Library is at 1330 E Valley Pkwy #G, Escondido, CA 92027 (behind IHOP) - Phone: (760) 745-2724 or Email: email@example.com
HSP "Meetup" on Apr. 15, 8-9:30 p.m.
If you live in Southern California you are invited to our HSP "Meetups" in Los Angeles that are held on the 3rd Wednesday of every month. To find out more about
the L.A. Meetups visit the Highly
Sensitive People Meetup site where you can sign up and join our HSP
Meetup group, and to RSVP for our next "Meetup." We meet at the new SHARE Center, 6666 Green Valley Circle, Culver City, across the 405 Freeway from the Hughes Center, from 8 p.m. until 9:30 p.m. Suggested $10 donation is appreciated to help pay for the room.
A Special Note: I want you to have one of the books that Dr. Pat Allen has based her therapies on, at no charge. The publisher has made arrangements with us to give away a FREE COPY of Napoleon Hill's famous book, Think & Grow Rich — that's the acclaimed book about the power of Positive Thinking that much of the Law of Attraction (and "The Secret") is based on. There are millionaires today who credit their success to the "secrets" they read in this book, including some of the authorities who appeared in the movie itself.
Anyway, it's a great deal from the publisher… just tell them where to send it, and they'll mail you the Number-One Success Book of all time.
You will find the details here: Get Your Free Book!
And really, feel free to pass this news on to your friends. They can get a copy of the book, too, if they act right away. This is one of my favorite books. I know they'll love it and thank you for your thoughtfulness!
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~ With Jim Hallowes, Founder of Highly Sensitive People ~